The recent conversation on elders and ethics has surfaced in me an evolving internal conversation on my own work and role in the present context of change and redefinition. I have found myself coming back again and again to my primary calling and my original agreement as a priest which has stirred up a number of emotions. On the one hand I have had feelings over the years that seem similar to anyone who has ended a relationship whether personal or professional – uncertainty, self-questioning, anxiety, and even resentment and frustration. On the other hand I am now experiencing feelings that seem similar to anyone who is ‘coming out’ and claiming an identity or role (albeit for a second time in my case) – excitement, anxiety, trepidation even. What is emerging essentially is my intention to reclaim the identity of priest. What is not emerging is any intention to return to the institution of church or priesthood.
Let me describe the thinking that is behind this internal conversation. I have always believed that we are essentially spiritual beings, not in a dualistic sense as in spirits who take on a body, but rather in the sense that the spiritual impulse is a fundamental part of us. By ‘spiritual impulse’ I refer to our need to belong, which means to experience ourselves as part of an interconnected universe. Clearly this sense of belonging can be immediate and concrete – like belonging to a family or a place – but it can also expand to infinite dimensions – like belonging to the universe or the source of all life. I also believe that religion is meant to serve this dimension of human life just as education is meant to serve the impulse to learn. Of course, religion and education (as well as government and health care and economics and indeed all the institutions of human society) must evolve in order to be effective in their purpose and role. I left the institution of religion and priesthood because I had come to believe that it was not doing this adequately. Of course when you leave an institution you no longer have the standing that you did, and, in some cases, you no longer have permission or authority to practice your profession. This applies to surgeons and government officials as well as Catholic priests. If you attempt to do so, you may be subject to responses that range from ridicule to resistance of various kinds.
All this is clear enough, I think, but let me discuss another aspect in order to see if I can relate this to something you may have experienced in your own life. My decision was certainly a personal one, but it was neither unique nor unusual. Many other priests did the same. But there is an even more important part of this and that is the fact that many people have left the institution of church for similar reasons (beliefs, ethical positions, politics, church regulations). Many of them also experienced the emotions of ending a relationship as I described above while they still felt the need for good religion (even if they might not have described it exactly like this) to serve the spiritual dimension or need that continued after they had left. You may recognize yourself in this group.
There have been various responses to this challenging situation that many have found themselves in. Some have turned to more fundamentalist religious forms while others have abandoned religious forms entirely. The majority have explored a wide variety of things, some helpful, some less so. The point is the essential need for good religion remains. And this is where my budding decision is headed. Many of you who know me will not be surprised. In fact, as is often the case with someone who ‘comes out,’ I am probably the last to know.
But let me say a few more things to help you (and myself) understand what I’m intending to do. I am not trying to found a new religion. Being Catholic for me is like being Irish: it doesn’t wash off! We are who we have become. Nor is this about some new kind of priesthood for I have probably been making this kind of contribution in whatever context I have found myself over the last twenty years: religious consultant to the UN, creator of a spiritually based Earth Charter, facilitator and trainer of Dialogue for the Centers of Disease Control (CDC), a director of organizational culture for the American Heart Association, coach for leaders in the non-profit world, consultant to organizations on the edge of change in society, and founder of our community conversations-for-action project in Bedford, NY that led to the sustainability work we are doing today.
So what am I saying? Simply this: I am formally offering my services from here on as a spiritual advisor and religious consultant (other definitions will no doubt emerge) to individuals and organizations and even communities (like municipalities) who want to address this essential spiritual dimension in their lives and work. And these are essential religious services, if you like. For religion is essentially about belonging and communion: the word in Latin refers to re-connecting. These services will take the form of spiritual guidance to help individuals experience and cultivate this belonging, and religious consulting to help an organization or community integrate this fundamental dimension into their work. Last week I quoted the Dalai Lama on how we need what he called a ‘secular ethics’ and I would describe as relevant religion for the times we live in.
It has taken me a while to come to this and it has taken a stirring of resolve to share it with you. So I would really appreciate any responses: insights or suggestions, critiques or corrections. Thanks
Danny
Right on Danny,
I just watched the video on “Cultural Creative.”
You may want to Google and watch their trailer with interviews with major change makers.
They claim there are 200 million leading thinkers of all sorts around the world who are beginning to come in sync relating to the next stage in global consciousness raising; … people like us who think we are alone!
It is a very inspiring piece.
As the technologically based changes in communication and networking efforts is sweeping the world, the anxiety and spiritual hunger for understanding, comfort, peace and and love is growing proportionately.
While this is a challenge for us people of faith, it is also an enormous opportunity to provide some balancing effort. Therefor we need PRIESTS like you who speak the language of the twenty first century religion and spirituality.
Thank you for your powerful reflection, Father Danny!
Hans
PS: In our small Chapel at Croton Falls we feel that spiritual hunger when once a month we have interfaith services, which thirty, forty or fifty people. For Winter Solstice last December we had a record 75 visitors, which is full house for our little Chapel.
Next interfaith service is January 22 at 10:30 am. All are welcome.
A powerful and insightful piece Danny…”we practice a code long since abandoned” but not entirely as the technology links groups and individuals globally the concentrated focus of a million minds can and do evolve a new awakening grounded in hard won experience…necessity the mother of invention.. testify brother..you have dived deep and as more and more people struggle in a soul less system they need to know that there are people like you ready willing and able to work with them to reclaim their humanity. Love Tommy
Having been raised a Quaker and seeing their “inner light” as a center of belief, and as an adult, becoming disenchanted with even that lightly organized religion, it became an easy transition for me to discover the feeling of power in ‘belonging to the earth’. I suppose more of the native american tradition of seeing the power of the universe expressed within the wind, waves, forest, stars, moon and sun and all creatures other than humans who inhabit the incomparable creation. There is a great need for others who understand our place in the universe. Best wishes, Danny
Danny, you’ve always been a priest to me. Blessings on your new emergence.
Bernie
Thanks for that very reflective piece, Danny. Well said.
I am neither an academic nor an apologist for anyone but this much I do know: there are people who are born to be spiritual leaders and ministers of the everchanging truths, and there are those who becomeleaders or are made to lead for the sake of the institutions. In my experience the latter are often responsible for the chaos that is Church today but those who are born to it will be the beacons that show the way inyto the future.
I like your analogy of “coming out” as has been associated with the gay community. People do not become gay, neither do men become priests: they are so from the beginning and neither does the Church make priests as in ordaining them so. Ordination is an act of recognising what is obvious to all from the beginning. Spiritual leaders are born not manufactored as Ghandi was, or anyone else who is able to say it for you as you feel it inside. I wish I could say it clearer but I try.
Danny, well done
I am just a middle class white girl trying to make a living and sometimes when the road turns and the lights go out then the next step is only lit by the priest in all of us. That is where you get divine quidance of where to go next. It takes courage to admit this openly and I know there is a demand for your services. God speed.
Nancy
Very exciting to read this so-eloquent reflection on the continuing evolution of your own personal journey !! Ever since you came down from NY to lead the “Religion” sector of our GA Global Forum almost 20 years ago – because we couldn’t find anyone else in the whole state or across the Southeast U.S. who could hold together ALL of the spiritual groups that would be represented – I’ve always thought of you as “priest” for some kind of universal Church of All Beings & Species !!! As such, you embody all of the charisms & best dimensions of that word. John K. mentioned “beacon” above – I resonate with that, and sometimes think also of the image of “Lighthouse” on these tempest-tossed Seas of our Lives…With your own deep spiritual gifts of insight, understanding, relationship, persepctive, speaking & writing skills, & talent for the Soul-languages of music & poetry, you are indeed a beacon for others, regardless of creed, church, race, nationality, gender, income, etc. … And I know I’m only One of Many who appreciate having you as Soul Friend & Priest for our particular Walk in Time !! P.S. We also appreciate your humor & jokes …!!! XO – Sue
Dear Danny,
There are professions or activities, which are best understood in terms of the “archetypes” they represent. I write this although I do not consider myself a Jungian.
Being myself a physician, who has retired from “active duty”, I strongly feel that I will never be able to completely “shed my skin of Shaman or Healer”.
Danny, I suspect that you were a priest, long before you entered the seminary. It does not come as a surprise to me that you feel the “Priest-Archetype” reclaiming its rightful place in your consciousness, and that you want to give voice to it now, even after the long period of time since you left the official (power) structure, where priests are supposed to “do their job”.
This brings me to the question: Is it appropriate to use the world “religion” as you do in your recent piece “COMING OUT: RELEVANT RELIGION”? The word “religion” is “loaded” by thousand years of history, during which, sadly enough, many religious institutions, rather than transmit a transcendent message, have become instruments of power, destruction and domination.
To clarify your position, wouldn’t it be worth considering the use of the (slightly awkward) expression of “Layman-Spirituality”?
The reason I bring up this question is the fact, that, – at least for me – Spirit can never be “put in a box”.
Having said this, I think that it is perfectly OK that some people will be touched by Spirit through a Catholic, Islamic, Buddhist or any other tradition that opens the way for the “metanoïa” that most of us humans experience in one form or the other.
Yours spiritually
Erik, Switzerland
Hi Danny – I just had the pleasure of meeting you and your lovely wife in New Hampshire and wanted to thank you for mentioning your blog, which I very much enjoyed. I’ve heard that our first adulthood is about playing out what is rooted in our childhood and the legacy our parents give us, and our second adulthood – if we are so fortunate to allow for and gain such wisdom – is when our true selves finally emerge, are recognized, and assume their rightful place. Whether this particular “coming of age” happens at 30 or 50 or 70 if at all, and whether the theme it carries is one of vocational defining, sexual orienting, or simply a voice that finally refuses to be subsumed, such a transformation is a gift. We may open it with trepidation or elation or any and every emotion in between — often taking years to unwrap — , but it is a gift that had been there all along just waiting to be discovered, acknowledged, and given life. This particular “coming of age” or coming out as you called it happened to me over the last five years, and as full of heartache as it was, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. All the best in your journey and in the help you give to others in discovering their true selves – be they an individual, a community, or an organization. Be well, Lisa M
Dear Danny,
Something big is happening in your life – and the end of the happening is still not fully visible. One part of me says “I wish I could have that courage” , but I know you passed the ‘courage’ part many years ago. One thing is sure: the ‘structured’ priesthood is not working (did it ever really do what it aimed at doing?) Your blog, and some of the comments attached, make me very curious about what will emerge – I wish I were younger to see what emerges. Who knows? Maybe I will see! For myself, where I am now, I just want to ‘sit back and feel the peace’!
Danny, I have long felt that by taking formal leave of the priesthood and marrying Ann, you became even more of a priest. I left Catholicism and probably left God for many years. Learning from you, I began to realize that I could reclaim my earliest deep connection with God by simply and wonderfully communicating directly rather than through a randomly appointed intermediary.
This realization continues to change my life. My children learned this early on by watching and listening to you. It came in by osmosis. You are so deeply a spiritual leader who has found a way to lead by guiding. The person you have always been radiates from you. You cause us to think. What you so deeply know, what you have found on your own spiritual path, and what you are learning causes a clean and honest rippling effect outward to the many who come in contact with you.
You are describing what I have long witnessed you to be. How fine that you are able to share these thoughts with us. I hold this with the deepest respect. Now by formally declaring that you are a spiritual advisor who is available to guide individuals, organizations of individuals, and communities in the spiritual dimensions of their lives and work, you are telling the Universe to spread the word. And we will.